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assumed 'tags' in /websites/forum2008/viewthread.php(601) : regexp code on line 2 Notice: Use of undefined constant tags - assumed 'tags' in /websites/forum2008/viewthread.php(601) : regexp code on line 1 Notice: Use of undefined constant tags - assumed 'tags' in /websites/forum2008/viewthread.php(601) : regexp code on line 2 家長如何應對孩子說髒話? - 親子 - 噓!論壇 _ 無忌的論壇 ~ 歡迎芝麻小事,別聊國家大事 ~

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家長如何應對孩子說髒話?

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家長如何應對孩子說髒話?

  先不要生氣,也不要著急,你想一想:2歲左右的寶寶為什麼會罵人,說髒話?
  其實,2歲的寶寶正處於無意識的學習狀態,他很努力地去模仿別人的一言一行,並以此為樂,可又不明白所模仿的語句的含義。因此,面對一個2歲寶寶所出現的這種不良行為,你可以採取上述媽媽們提出的辦法。

  [B][color="purple"]第一招:冷處理法[/B]
  冷處理法又稱為消退法。是指某一行為反復出現時,若這個行為得不到強化,這種行為的發生率就會降低。通過消退程式即停止強化,可以使某種反應的頻率降低,消除寶寶已建立的不良行為。

具體措施可以像甜寶貝媽媽所說的那樣,不打她,也不和她說道理,假裝沒聽見,對她不理不問。慢慢地,她覺得沒趣自然就不說了。或者不理睬她,走開,保持沉默或繼續做你手中的事情,通過以上方式讓寶寶感到,說髒話並不能引起大人的注意,說髒話並不好玩,這樣她才會自動減少說髒話的次數。

  這裏需要提醒你注意的是:當寶寶說髒話時,你千萬不要大發雷霆,表現出異常憤怒的樣子,或重複寶寶的髒話,這樣不但不能解決問題,只會強化這種不良行為。

[B][color="purple"]第二招:模仿療法[/B]
  模仿療法又稱為示範法,指通過觀察別人的行為,學習和獲得良好行為,減少和消除不良行為的一種矯正方法。

通過觀察他人的行為來改變個體自己的行為是相當有效的,其主要類型有:影視、錄影、讀物模仿法、現場模仿法、參與模仿法等。上面的一位媽媽“編個故事讓寶寶自己體會”就是一個典型的讀物模仿法。她在故事中讓寶寶最喜歡的東西擬人化,讓寶寶體會到被人罵是件非常不舒服的事情,同時,在故事中要給寶寶一些好的建議,比如在他生氣的時候可以找人傾訴或者和喜愛的玩具說一說等等,而不能用罵人的方式。總之,你可以運用多種策略去幫助寶寶模仿學習正確的良好的行為,最終也能讓他改掉罵人的不良行為。
  [B][color="purple"]第三招:認知行為療法[/B]
  這是通過糾正不合理的思想活動或信念來改變兒童行為的一種方法。它的特點是深入到內部思想的改造上。這種方法的種類很多,心理學家貝克的認知療法強調兒童對自己行為的認識,注重通過直接干預和重建等手段來改變兒童的認知,從而改變兒童的行為。

  [B][color="purple"]基本步驟如下:[/B]

  Step1:瞭解寶寶身上存在的不良行為,幫助他認識到罵人是一種不好的行為,就像上面的lucky媽媽一樣。

  Step2:這個年齡段,寶寶的自我意識尚未分化出主體與客體。所以,當你問他:“罵人,好不好?”他一般會答你:“不好!”這是因為在他的自我意識中,罵人說髒話是別人做的,不包括他自己。他說這些髒話,只是在模仿,覺得好玩而已。因此,你不要從道德品質的角度去衡量這件事,而應教導並積極暗示寶寶:這種行為是不對的。雖然這時他的自我意識不完善,但如果他也認同“罵人是不好的行為”,那麼,我們就能進一步說服和教育他,下一次沒准他就會很大方地指出或承認錯誤了。

  Step3:對寶寶的各種良好表現,一定要給予適當的回饋與強化,如能改掉毛病,或者表現出一點點良好的跡象時就及時表揚他,使他徹底地去掉罵人的壞行為。

[B][color="purple"]第四招:適當懲罰法[/B]
  如果寶寶長大了一點,比如到五六歲了,仍有這種不良行為,就可以給他適當的懲罰,促使他反省自己的行為。

  [B][color="purple"]第五招:環境隔離法[/B]
你不妨仔細想想:寶寶為什麼罵人、說髒話?如果追因溯源之後,發現他是受到不良環境的影響,那麼就該採取環境隔離法,讓他遠離不良環境,如送到幼稚園,不讓他跟一些說髒話的孩子一起玩,為他創造一個文明的環境;或者自己帶在身邊,即使不能完全放在身邊,還需要長輩代其養育時,就要告訴長輩,不要在寶寶面前說髒話。正如上面的寶寶媽媽所說:“脫離了不好的環境,慢慢的他就會忘記。”

  [B][color="Purple"]理解性習得原因[/B]
  幼稚園裏,幾個男孩子圍著長得胖嘟嘟的佳佳,嘴裏叫著“胖子”、“肥豬”,佳佳委屈得大哭起來。

  [B][color="purple"]分析:[/B]這些男孩對著佳佳說髒話,除了出於好玩兒,互相模仿,還具有了一定的選擇性,他們能夠初步理解髒話的含義,對特定物件說髒話,可以算是一種有意識的行為。

  為什麼會出現有意說髒話的行為?首先必須清楚這一階段兒童的心理特點。3歲寶寶的智力發育很快,出現了自我意識的萌芽,開始形成了表像、想像和思維,能用語言表達自己的感受。他能夠在頭腦中形成對客觀事物的形象,不但能記住那些具體的、自己體驗過的事物,而且還能記住那些聽來的、自己說過的抽象的事物。所以,會用髒話的形式將佳佳是個胖寶寶的事實表達出來。

  [B][color="purple"]對策:[/B]
  1.創造一個文明的環境。爸爸媽媽首先要做到語言美、行為美,為寶寶做出榜樣。
  2.在集體環境中,如果發現個別寶寶說髒話,你要及時制止,防止他對寶寶產生影響。制止的方法以“冷處理”為宜。切忌當著大家的面批評、羞辱寶寶,這一方面會刺傷寶寶的自尊心,另一方面,對其他寶寶會起到消極暗示的作用。

  3.培養寶寶對其他小朋友的好感。你可以問寶寶,“你是喜歡別人表揚你呢,還是喜歡別人批評你?”讓寶寶瞭解,適時地向別人示好勝於批評、嘲笑別人。
非理解性習得原因

  奇奇(化名)兩歲半。奇奇媽說,他奶奶罵爺爺的時候,不僅自己罵,還教奇奇說:“奇奇,說爺爺戇度(懶鬼、鄉下人、老頭子)”。所以奇奇現在對著爺爺一套一套的,爺爺也不生氣,高興著呢。我真反感他們這樣做。

分析:寶寶往往沒有分辨是非善惡美醜的能力,還不能理解髒話的意義。如果在他所處的環境中出現了髒話,例如家人或外面有人講,都能成為寶寶模仿的對象,寶寶會像學習其他本領一樣學著說並在家中“展示”。如果你這時不加以干預,反而默許,像奇奇的爺爺那樣,甚至覺得很有意思而加以間接鼓勵,則更會強化寶寶的模仿行為。

 [B][color="purple"] 對策:

  1.冷靜應對[/B]
  當寶寶口出髒話時,你無須反應過度。過度反應對於尚不能瞭解髒話意義的寶寶來講,只會刺激他重複髒話的行為,他會認為說髒話可以引起你更多的注意。所以冷靜應對才是最重要的處理原則。不妨先問寶寶是否真的懂得這些髒話的意義?他真正想表達的又是什麼?

  [B][color="purple"]2.解釋說明[/B]
  運用解釋與說明,是為寶寶傳達正面、澄清負面社會價值的好方法。在和寶寶的討論過程中,要儘量讓他理解,粗俗不雅的語言為何不被大家接受?髒話傳達著什麼樣侮辱的意味?也讓寶寶體會體會,聽到這樣的語言時,是如何感受到不被尊重。

  [B][color="purple"]3.正面引導[/B]
  你還要悉心引導寶寶,教他換個說法試試。彼此定下規則,隨時提醒寶寶,告訴他如果能克制自己不說髒話,才是乖寶寶。

  [B][color="Purple"]4.尋求支持[/B]
  如果他人無意在寶寶面前說出髒話,那麼你最好提醒他們,不要當著寶寶的面說出不雅的言詞;如果他人是為了好玩兒,而有意教寶寶說髒話,那麼你應該鄭重地告訴他,這種做法是錯誤的,千萬不能因為面子問題對此視而不見,這將會對寶寶的未來產生重大的影響。
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